Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
