people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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