Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Randomize
