just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
