They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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