I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
