Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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