Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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