Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
