Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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