It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize