It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
