the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
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