mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
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