girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
She told me I should be a condom model.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize