actually, I'm a sock model
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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