yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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