these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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