just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
