These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
