He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
