Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
