Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
If its not for food we ain't going out.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
