My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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