im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
