I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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