i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Randomize
