Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
