is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
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