Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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