if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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