weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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