Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
