I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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