I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
