it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
