i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Randomize
