Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
