i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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