You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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