At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
