How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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