no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
