Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize