You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
