Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
