She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
