there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
