super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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