I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
